I had another appointment this morning. My follicles are still too small to measure which worries me. Last time, at this point, it seemed they were growing rather quickly. I understand this is completely different than the IUI I did last Fall, but that fear is still there. Is my body not responding to the medicines like it should? I'm waiting for the doctor to call back with my lab results... I went in at 8 this morning and I've been on edge since. My usual doctor wasn't on call this weekend so it'll be a different doctor that will call with information and directions for medicines tonight.
I had my preop appointment on Friday and my doctor stayed in the room while we did our ultrasound and he didn't seem worried. And when the nurse called back that day, she didn't seem worried either. I guess I just figured my biggest let-down would be if we didn't get pregnant from this... but what if I don't even make it to egg retrevial and transfer?
My doctor keeps assuring me he wants to go slow since I'm at a high risk for OHSS (ovary overstimulation). I'm just such a big worrier. Because of insurance, we will probably only have one chance at this. And it's hard to explain all the feelings and emotions that go into infertility... Half the time I keep everything bottled up inside because it makes ME feel like I'm some sort of failure.
I keep telling myself God has a plan. I need to trust him and his timing. I've cleaned, baked cookies, done laundry.. all since I've gotten home to stay busy. I just need to try to relax until I talk to the doctor. Whew.
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