My transfer was Tuesday morning and compared to the retrieval... it was nothin'! I was just pumped because we had to be there at 7:30am (it was scheduled for 9am) and we got a private room with a TV to chill in before it was time to go. Nothing like a lil' Boy Meets World before showtime, right?!
The doctor came in to talk with us before they got ready to take me back. We got to see a picture of our 2 beautiful embryos. I've never fallen in love so quickly! :) He quickly walked us through the process, and then it was time to go!
Glenn couldn't go with me so he had to go wait in the outpatient waiting area. They took me to the same room I was in on Saturday. For the embryo transfer, I didn't have to be put to sleep so I was wide awake. You notice a lot more about the room... There's a little window in the wall that opens right to their laboratory (where they've been keeping my embryos). The nurse explained to me that the eggs go out that window into the lab and then come back in through that little window. There were a good bit of people in the room with us this time... but after going through this whole process, unfortunately, you have no more shame. There was the OR nurse, the doctor, a med student doing his IVF rotation, and the ultrasound tech (the SAME sweet lady from the office who has been doing most of my ultrasounds through this whole process.. so happy to see her!).
The whole process did not hurt.. kinda like a trip to the girl doctor (don't we ladies ALL love that appointment). They use the ultrasound to make sure they release the embryos in a good spot in the uterus. I was turned away from the monitor so I couldn't actually see it happen, but the doctor kept telling me exactly what he was doing, while he did it. Literally, took, maybe 7 minutes.
Afterwards, I was left with the OR nurse in the same room... laying head down, feet up for 15 minutes. The nurse was hilarious. I didn't have to say much because she did A LOT of the talking... she "cleaned house" for a bit and then told me that working there was very similar to what people see in Grey's Anatomy. She also told me she has to watch what she posts on Facebook because there's someone in HR who pretty much only stalks employees, waiting to find reason to fire them. She can't post anything about leaving early or taking a mental health day... I asked her how much they get paid, because, c'mon... I'm a pretty good Facebook stalker. She said more than she makes. Maybe I will look into it..?
After my 15 minutes was up, I was finally wheeled into a recovery room, but I had to stay tilted. Luckily Glenn was able to come with me and wait. It was too awkward to try to figure out how to watch TV so we just talked about all kinds of stuff. We talked to my belly too, begging those embryos to stick.
Finally, my HOUR, was up. Thank goodness, because I was sick and tired of looking at the sky out the window. We came home and took it easy pretty much all day. They don't necessarily want strict bed rest, but they encourage you to sit/lay down a good part of the day. I took Wednesday off too (oops, I hope no one finds reason to fire me for that), just for peace of mind. I was able to move around a little more, which was nice.
So, now we just wait. I have to continue taking estrogen and progesterone, two important hormones for pregnancy. I can't do any strenuous exercise or lift heavy things. I didn't have to carry in ANY groceries from the store today.. I could get used to this!! :) We do have Spring Break all next week so I'm currently trying to make plans to keep me busy and my mind occupied (holla at a girl if you're bored!!). I thought since I have all this "free" time, I would maybe start cooking. I figured I'd be more worried about trying not to burn my house down rather than what's going on in my belly. I started easy today with some Italian Pasta. It's been sitting in the fridge all day and I can't wait to try it tonight!
I'm continuing with the acupuncture too. Anything that could possibly help. I went this afternoon and fell asleep. It was a very nice nap. Since Tuesday, I make sure I take a little bit of time to talk to my belly and try to encourage those embryos to stay. I think they will be very happy there. I hope they agree!
Friday, March 29, 2013
Sunday, March 24, 2013
A LOT has happened!
So, wow! A lot has happened since I last updated.. I know I've been keeping everyone in the loop through Facebook. I just haven't had time to update this thing! I'm taking it easy today so I figured it would be the perfect time! :) Let me back up to Thursday...
Glenn and I went in on Thursday for my ultrasound and lab work. On Tuesday, my largest follicle was at 13mm. By Thursday, I had one at 19 and several at 18mm. I had asked earlier in the week and she told me they were aiming for egg retrieval over the weekend or early next week. Welp.. she calls me back Thursday, RIGHT as we are lining up for lunch (Thank goodness for my wonderful student teacher who jumped right in and took charge!). She told us we were scheduled for egg retrieval on Saturday morning and we needed to do our trigger shot that night. At that point, I had 11 mature follicles and then 8 right behind it.
I never made it this far before.. so I was beyond excited! But a little nervous about the trigger shot (makes you ovulate). The shot has to be given in a muscle so the needle is a bit longer than the others I've done. Yikes! But I closed my eyes and told Glenn I didn't want to see it. It didn't hurt near as bad as I thought, but it still wasn't very pleasant.
Friday we had Arts Day so that kept my mind off things! I was exhausted by the end of the day though and my sides were sore. I went to go visit my grandparents that night and I told them I wouldn't be able to come visit on Saturday. Mom tried to explain to Grandpa that we were having surgery to help us have a baby (she has explained to both Grandpa and Nana what we're doing in simple terms). He wished us luck and Mom said, "I want to be a Grandma" and we all lost it. :)
Saturday morning I was awake by 4am. We didn't have to be at the hospital till about 6:30, but I wanted to be early.
We were the only ones in the preop waiting area for awhile... I met all the nurses, and had to change into such a snazzy looking gown. The nurse that did my IV was actually an IVF baby! I thought that was a good sign. The doctor came to talk to us right before they wheeled me back. He is not my usual doctor, but I've met him before.. he is VERY nice and just walked us through the procedure. The last thing I remember is them wheeling me into the surgery room and looking at this light on the ceiling. I also remember telling them to make sure I was asleep before they started...
When I woke up, I could hear the doctor and the nurses talking. The nurse asked how many they had gotten and I heard "over 30." I was somewhat awake by the time Glenn got there. They said they had gotten between 46-49, but were still counting. The doctor told Glenn he's only had one other patient with that many eggs retrieved. Crazy! I actually got to meet the embryologist (the egg keeper). The nurse said he never comes to talk to the patients, but they told me I was one of the "lucky ones" who has the option to freeze eggs for next time. I had to fill out some paperwork and talked to him one last time before I got to come home!
I slept on and off throughout the day. Overall, I'm not in pain, just really sore. It's difficult to get up and down. And I can't get around very quickly. I've been guzzling water, Vitamin Waters, and Powerades because I really do NOT want to get OHSS. With as many eggs as they were able to get, I'm at a higher risk of getting overhyperstimulation syndrome. Basically the ovaries become enlarged and swollen. It can cause upset stomach and major bloating. I was told some bloating is normal, but I've got to keep an eye on it. I'm trying to stay as hydrated as possible!! I had already cut out as much sodium as I could a few days before Thursday (my nurse told me that helps too).
I go back on Tuesday for my transfer. The doctor called this morning and told us 16 were fertilized and I've got 14 eggs that will be frozen for future use (without fertilization). He said we are looking at a strong possibility of freezing some embryos too. Out of the 16, they will probably put 2 strong embryos back in. So please, please, please help us by praying that we'll get 2 good lookin' ones! :)
THANK YOU all for your sweet messages, texts, and phone calls. Glenn and I are excited that this could be the beginning to our family! I've just been thanking God every night for what he has blessed us with so far. Besides taking my medicines (no more shots!!), it's pretty much out of my hands now. :)
Glenn and I went in on Thursday for my ultrasound and lab work. On Tuesday, my largest follicle was at 13mm. By Thursday, I had one at 19 and several at 18mm. I had asked earlier in the week and she told me they were aiming for egg retrieval over the weekend or early next week. Welp.. she calls me back Thursday, RIGHT as we are lining up for lunch (Thank goodness for my wonderful student teacher who jumped right in and took charge!). She told us we were scheduled for egg retrieval on Saturday morning and we needed to do our trigger shot that night. At that point, I had 11 mature follicles and then 8 right behind it.
I never made it this far before.. so I was beyond excited! But a little nervous about the trigger shot (makes you ovulate). The shot has to be given in a muscle so the needle is a bit longer than the others I've done. Yikes! But I closed my eyes and told Glenn I didn't want to see it. It didn't hurt near as bad as I thought, but it still wasn't very pleasant.
Friday we had Arts Day so that kept my mind off things! I was exhausted by the end of the day though and my sides were sore. I went to go visit my grandparents that night and I told them I wouldn't be able to come visit on Saturday. Mom tried to explain to Grandpa that we were having surgery to help us have a baby (she has explained to both Grandpa and Nana what we're doing in simple terms). He wished us luck and Mom said, "I want to be a Grandma" and we all lost it. :)
Saturday morning I was awake by 4am. We didn't have to be at the hospital till about 6:30, but I wanted to be early.
We were the only ones in the preop waiting area for awhile... I met all the nurses, and had to change into such a snazzy looking gown. The nurse that did my IV was actually an IVF baby! I thought that was a good sign. The doctor came to talk to us right before they wheeled me back. He is not my usual doctor, but I've met him before.. he is VERY nice and just walked us through the procedure. The last thing I remember is them wheeling me into the surgery room and looking at this light on the ceiling. I also remember telling them to make sure I was asleep before they started...
When I woke up, I could hear the doctor and the nurses talking. The nurse asked how many they had gotten and I heard "over 30." I was somewhat awake by the time Glenn got there. They said they had gotten between 46-49, but were still counting. The doctor told Glenn he's only had one other patient with that many eggs retrieved. Crazy! I actually got to meet the embryologist (the egg keeper). The nurse said he never comes to talk to the patients, but they told me I was one of the "lucky ones" who has the option to freeze eggs for next time. I had to fill out some paperwork and talked to him one last time before I got to come home!
I slept on and off throughout the day. Overall, I'm not in pain, just really sore. It's difficult to get up and down. And I can't get around very quickly. I've been guzzling water, Vitamin Waters, and Powerades because I really do NOT want to get OHSS. With as many eggs as they were able to get, I'm at a higher risk of getting overhyperstimulation syndrome. Basically the ovaries become enlarged and swollen. It can cause upset stomach and major bloating. I was told some bloating is normal, but I've got to keep an eye on it. I'm trying to stay as hydrated as possible!! I had already cut out as much sodium as I could a few days before Thursday (my nurse told me that helps too).
I go back on Tuesday for my transfer. The doctor called this morning and told us 16 were fertilized and I've got 14 eggs that will be frozen for future use (without fertilization). He said we are looking at a strong possibility of freezing some embryos too. Out of the 16, they will probably put 2 strong embryos back in. So please, please, please help us by praying that we'll get 2 good lookin' ones! :)
THANK YOU all for your sweet messages, texts, and phone calls. Glenn and I are excited that this could be the beginning to our family! I've just been thanking God every night for what he has blessed us with so far. Besides taking my medicines (no more shots!!), it's pretty much out of my hands now. :)
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Wahoo!
So, so, so, so, so HAPPY!!
We've had two AWESOME appointments this week! I went in Sunday morning before church and luckily my doctor was the one doing the weekend shift. Apparently my ultrasound looked promising and my estrogen had gone up again into the 400s. We chatted for a bit... he told me he was very happy with the way this cycle was going! Apparently it's going better than my previous IUI cycle (where I overproduced). He seems to know me pretty well because he asked me how was I doing and I told him I was okay... Then he asked me again -- How are you really feeling? He explained to me why this IVF cycle seemed to be going so well as opposed to my last IVF attempt. He knows how nervous I am about all this and he keeps reassuring me everything is going right on track so far!
I went back again this morning and they were measuring away!! MANY follicles on my left and right side. My largest so far is 13mm. The IVF nurse and the ultrasound lady kept commenting how "beautiful" it all looked. My follicles are also grouped together which is a good thing. And get this... my estrogen jumped up to 1200 -- something or other. MAJOR plus!! They dropped my meds for tonight and tomorrow, and I go back on Thursday morning. I had to also add in another injection today -- Cetrotide -- which stops my body from ovulating on its own. Thank goodness for our sweet school nurse who was able to do my shot! Glenn does all my shots at home because I'm pretty much a big baby, but it was one of those things where when I was told to take this, I take it, no questions asked! I had one stored at school, just in case!
I really cannot wait to go back on Thursday! I asked when they were aiming for egg retrieval and the nurse said Saturday at the earliest, but more than likely Sunday or Monday. Which would put my transfer midweek next week. I don't feel pain or sick or anything like that... but I can feel some pressure in my sides. Sometimes it's uncomfortable to sit a certain way because I feel like something's poking me. Dear lord, all I want to wear is something loose and comfortable. Dresses will become my new best friend, however, I hear it's supposed to get cold again. Don't judge if it's 30s and I show up, white legs and all, in a dress.
I've been spending my time after school with my grandparents. Grandpa's not doing too well. We got a hospital bed over the weekend for him, and he is on an oxygen tank. He seems to perk up after dinner (he isn't eating too much) and we get a chance to talk. He doesn't respond with much, but some. Last night Nana told me he was sick and that's why he doesn't talk. This was big for her because she couldn't understand why he wouldn't talk back to her in the beginning. She kept saying he was mad at her and that's why. But what's funny is Grandpa was trying to say something last night and Nana goes, "Don't listen to him.. he is sick. He doesn't know what he's talking about."
She has been our comic relief in all this... she gets all her stories confused and today she told my cousin that everyone thought she was adopted. She also told me she would travel all over to watch me be in parades and I used to do the flag. Apparently I was pretty good. She also told me her grandparents LOVED me (never met them). And my mom gave her these canisters she has in her kitchen as a wedding present (can you figure out the logistics in that one)?
It has kinda become my routine to go and eat dinner over there... spend some time with Mom, Nana, and Grandpa. Jessie comes when she can and Amy, my cousin, will be here till tomorrow. I look forward to seeing what funny things Nana will say! Mom did say earlier today she was asking Mom how I was doing. Mom tried explaining to her that Glenn and I were having to go to a doctor to try to have a baby, and she wanted to know how that was going. When Mom told her things were going good (without too many details), she said Nana got so excited.
Of course, later that night, Nana told me she just loved the two girls I had. She never had girls and would love when they would come over and play... (sigh).
We've had two AWESOME appointments this week! I went in Sunday morning before church and luckily my doctor was the one doing the weekend shift. Apparently my ultrasound looked promising and my estrogen had gone up again into the 400s. We chatted for a bit... he told me he was very happy with the way this cycle was going! Apparently it's going better than my previous IUI cycle (where I overproduced). He seems to know me pretty well because he asked me how was I doing and I told him I was okay... Then he asked me again -- How are you really feeling? He explained to me why this IVF cycle seemed to be going so well as opposed to my last IVF attempt. He knows how nervous I am about all this and he keeps reassuring me everything is going right on track so far!
I went back again this morning and they were measuring away!! MANY follicles on my left and right side. My largest so far is 13mm. The IVF nurse and the ultrasound lady kept commenting how "beautiful" it all looked. My follicles are also grouped together which is a good thing. And get this... my estrogen jumped up to 1200 -- something or other. MAJOR plus!! They dropped my meds for tonight and tomorrow, and I go back on Thursday morning. I had to also add in another injection today -- Cetrotide -- which stops my body from ovulating on its own. Thank goodness for our sweet school nurse who was able to do my shot! Glenn does all my shots at home because I'm pretty much a big baby, but it was one of those things where when I was told to take this, I take it, no questions asked! I had one stored at school, just in case!
I really cannot wait to go back on Thursday! I asked when they were aiming for egg retrieval and the nurse said Saturday at the earliest, but more than likely Sunday or Monday. Which would put my transfer midweek next week. I don't feel pain or sick or anything like that... but I can feel some pressure in my sides. Sometimes it's uncomfortable to sit a certain way because I feel like something's poking me. Dear lord, all I want to wear is something loose and comfortable. Dresses will become my new best friend, however, I hear it's supposed to get cold again. Don't judge if it's 30s and I show up, white legs and all, in a dress.
I've been spending my time after school with my grandparents. Grandpa's not doing too well. We got a hospital bed over the weekend for him, and he is on an oxygen tank. He seems to perk up after dinner (he isn't eating too much) and we get a chance to talk. He doesn't respond with much, but some. Last night Nana told me he was sick and that's why he doesn't talk. This was big for her because she couldn't understand why he wouldn't talk back to her in the beginning. She kept saying he was mad at her and that's why. But what's funny is Grandpa was trying to say something last night and Nana goes, "Don't listen to him.. he is sick. He doesn't know what he's talking about."
She has been our comic relief in all this... she gets all her stories confused and today she told my cousin that everyone thought she was adopted. She also told me she would travel all over to watch me be in parades and I used to do the flag. Apparently I was pretty good. She also told me her grandparents LOVED me (never met them). And my mom gave her these canisters she has in her kitchen as a wedding present (can you figure out the logistics in that one)?
It has kinda become my routine to go and eat dinner over there... spend some time with Mom, Nana, and Grandpa. Jessie comes when she can and Amy, my cousin, will be here till tomorrow. I look forward to seeing what funny things Nana will say! Mom did say earlier today she was asking Mom how I was doing. Mom tried explaining to her that Glenn and I were having to go to a doctor to try to have a baby, and she wanted to know how that was going. When Mom told her things were going good (without too many details), she said Nana got so excited.
Of course, later that night, Nana told me she just loved the two girls I had. She never had girls and would love when they would come over and play... (sigh).
Saturday, March 16, 2013
I've Been Keeping a Secret...
So, I've been keeping a bit of a secret from a lot of you. Glenn and I started our new IVF cycle LAST Saturday. I didn't want to make a big deal of it in case things didn't go the way they were supposed to (i.e. like the last attempt). However, we got EXCELLENT news yesterday! My estrogen level has gone from 15 to 40 to 182! I've got several follicles growing, almost large enough for them to measure (they usually have to be around 10mm before they measure). The ultrasound lady's exact words were, "You are about to bloom!"
We went ahead and continued with our preop appointment and I go back on Sunday to monitor and see what's happening in there. I am cautiously excited! I don't want to get my hopes up too high. I told Glenn sometimes I wish we HAD made it through the last cycle and it just didn't work because then I wouldn't be constantly comparing everything to that. I was too excited after hearing my news yesterday that I told several people so the cat is pretty much out of the bag. I would appreciate any and all prayers for another GREAT appointment tomorrow. I keep thanking God every night for what he's doing and I just hope this is finally the right time for our family.
I've also been doing acupuncture. I went twice this week and I will go twice after my transfer. Apparently it's supposed to increase your chances of a successful IVF. I REALLY, REALLY enjoy it. Yesterday I fell asleep. You would think if you had all these pins (or needles.. not sure what to call them) sticking out of you it would be difficult to relax, but totally NOT the case. If you are looking for a new way to help with stress or pain, I'm tellin' you... give it a try!
I feel pretty okay... just really tired by the end of the day. My sides are hurting a little bit and my back, but I hear that's normal. If it means my ovaries are producing possible babies, bring it. I can handle it. I've been told it could be more uncomfortable the further we get into the process. I've stopping running and am probably going to stick with walking. I woke up this morning with the full intention of going to the gym, but that didn't happen. Jessie and I are going to go walk downtown later today.
On a much sadder note, my Grandpa was diagnosed with cancer about a week and a half ago. Everything has happened so suddenly. They think it's pancreatic cancer, but they do know it has spread. I've been going to visit him and Nana frequently. Poor Nana has some health problems as well, such as dementia. Last Saturday she forgot I was married (she thought Glenn was my brother... Now, THAT would be awkward), and when I told her, she claimed no one had told her. So I brought her a picture of our wedding day, a picture SHE was in, and she was so tickled. She said she was going to treasure it and would not let go of it.
Grandpa is home and he's slow and sleeps a lot. BUT, he sure has his appetite. Last night he asked for some ziti AND pizza! And Glenn's mom would nice enough to make him a pound cake (his favorite). He's excited about that. My mom has been going through their papers, trying to get things organized and she came across letters my Nana saved from when Grandpa was in World War 2. She let us (my cousins are here for the weekend) read them last night. Talk about COOL. Grandpa doesn't talk much about the war in his letters, but he's always giving Nana a hard time about not having to work and taking mini vacations. :) It was neat to have a sneak peak into their lives way before any of us were even a thought.
Yesterday I was asked how I feel about Grandpa being sick. I am sad, but I feel in my heart that him and Nana are ready to be somewhere together where neither one of them hurts. They aren't themselves. Nana doesn't remember much and seems sad. I know Heaven will be a place for them where they can do all the things they haven't been able to do these past few years. And I'm sure Grandpa will be the one up there telling God what to do. They are both in their 90s and have been married for 65 years. They've been through so much.. and are such amazing people. I love them very much.
So, I would appreciate a lot of prayers, if you don't mind. Prayers that things continue to go well for our IVF cycle. Prayers that my Grandpa and Nana aren't in much pain. Prayers of strength for my Mom who has been working very hard to take care of them.
We went ahead and continued with our preop appointment and I go back on Sunday to monitor and see what's happening in there. I am cautiously excited! I don't want to get my hopes up too high. I told Glenn sometimes I wish we HAD made it through the last cycle and it just didn't work because then I wouldn't be constantly comparing everything to that. I was too excited after hearing my news yesterday that I told several people so the cat is pretty much out of the bag. I would appreciate any and all prayers for another GREAT appointment tomorrow. I keep thanking God every night for what he's doing and I just hope this is finally the right time for our family.
I've also been doing acupuncture. I went twice this week and I will go twice after my transfer. Apparently it's supposed to increase your chances of a successful IVF. I REALLY, REALLY enjoy it. Yesterday I fell asleep. You would think if you had all these pins (or needles.. not sure what to call them) sticking out of you it would be difficult to relax, but totally NOT the case. If you are looking for a new way to help with stress or pain, I'm tellin' you... give it a try!
I feel pretty okay... just really tired by the end of the day. My sides are hurting a little bit and my back, but I hear that's normal. If it means my ovaries are producing possible babies, bring it. I can handle it. I've been told it could be more uncomfortable the further we get into the process. I've stopping running and am probably going to stick with walking. I woke up this morning with the full intention of going to the gym, but that didn't happen. Jessie and I are going to go walk downtown later today.
On a much sadder note, my Grandpa was diagnosed with cancer about a week and a half ago. Everything has happened so suddenly. They think it's pancreatic cancer, but they do know it has spread. I've been going to visit him and Nana frequently. Poor Nana has some health problems as well, such as dementia. Last Saturday she forgot I was married (she thought Glenn was my brother... Now, THAT would be awkward), and when I told her, she claimed no one had told her. So I brought her a picture of our wedding day, a picture SHE was in, and she was so tickled. She said she was going to treasure it and would not let go of it.
Grandpa is home and he's slow and sleeps a lot. BUT, he sure has his appetite. Last night he asked for some ziti AND pizza! And Glenn's mom would nice enough to make him a pound cake (his favorite). He's excited about that. My mom has been going through their papers, trying to get things organized and she came across letters my Nana saved from when Grandpa was in World War 2. She let us (my cousins are here for the weekend) read them last night. Talk about COOL. Grandpa doesn't talk much about the war in his letters, but he's always giving Nana a hard time about not having to work and taking mini vacations. :) It was neat to have a sneak peak into their lives way before any of us were even a thought.
Yesterday I was asked how I feel about Grandpa being sick. I am sad, but I feel in my heart that him and Nana are ready to be somewhere together where neither one of them hurts. They aren't themselves. Nana doesn't remember much and seems sad. I know Heaven will be a place for them where they can do all the things they haven't been able to do these past few years. And I'm sure Grandpa will be the one up there telling God what to do. They are both in their 90s and have been married for 65 years. They've been through so much.. and are such amazing people. I love them very much.
So, I would appreciate a lot of prayers, if you don't mind. Prayers that things continue to go well for our IVF cycle. Prayers that my Grandpa and Nana aren't in much pain. Prayers of strength for my Mom who has been working very hard to take care of them.
Sunday, March 3, 2013
It's Been Awhile...
But I'm still here! Not too much has been going on lately (as far as the IVF stuff). I've just been truckin' along, taking my hormones(no weird side effects yet.. like a beard, as my student teacher will tease me about)! I added in the last one last Tuesday so I'll finish this cycle up and see what happens. So far, I've been feeling pretty good! I definitely feel like I have more energy and I think that's because my levels were SO low before. One morning this week, I was wide awake by 4:30 and didn't stop till 10pm that night. WAY unlike me!! I promised myself I wouldn't worry during this lull -- no more obsessing over what should happen, when it should happen, what if it doesn't happen. I'm just livin' and enjoyin' the day as it comes. It's amazing what letting go of that stress and worry does for a person! It's taken me a LONG time to realize it, but it WILL happen in God's time.
My sister, Glenn, and I have been going to church together these past few Sundays. Glenn goes when he can (sometimes he has to work). You know sometimes you go and listen to the sermon and it just SPEAKS to you? Well, that happened today. Our sermon was about the times when something bad may happen and we ask ourselves what we did to God to make him angry. I ask myself this a lot ... "Why is God making this so hard? What did I do to make him so mad at me?" And you start to question all those things you've done in your past. I've even had this conversation with a good friend and she tried to explain to me that God doesn't do things out of spite. He doesn't make bad things happen to punish us. I listened to her try to explain that to me, but deep down, I wasn't convinced. That was awhile ago and I haven't brought it up to many others since then.
But in today's sermon, our pastor talked about how God has a patient love for us. He keeps giving us chances to life the life he wants us to live, even if we keep making mistakes. He forgives us. And he will test us, but he will not give us more than we can handle and he will provide a way out for us so we are able to withstand and endure those challenges. It just really hit home a lot of the feelings that have been jumbling up inside me. It was one of those LIGHTBULB moments I always see when I'm teaching something to my kids.
Of course, I sent a text to my good friend right after church to tell her all about it. It was just what I needed to hear. Like I mentioned earlier, I am really trying to just relax this month. I feel like a happier person. I've been able to go to some of my students' extracurricular activities and see those cuties outside of school and that has been fun. They always look so much smaller in the "real world." One of those cuties came up to me on Friday, gave me a big hug, and goes, "Mrs. Kellett, I love coming to school because it's so fun." Every teacher's dream right there.. totally melted my heart. And if you knew this little boy, you would understand why it meant so much.
I know I say this on like, every post, but I do appreciate all your comments, prayers, gestures, etc. I don't know how many people really read this, but yesterday, I had several people who I don't see on a regular basis say that they keep up with this thing and are praying for me. It really means a lot. I know this may sound silly, but I feel like your love and support has really helped me get through this month and just feel at peace with everything that has happened. It has helped give me a new sense of hope of things to come, whatever they may be. So thank you!
That's about it for now.. one last thing I also want to share is a forward I received from another friend. She said as soon as she read it, she thought of me. I printed it out and have it close by as a reminder, whenever I need it. :)
My sister, Glenn, and I have been going to church together these past few Sundays. Glenn goes when he can (sometimes he has to work). You know sometimes you go and listen to the sermon and it just SPEAKS to you? Well, that happened today. Our sermon was about the times when something bad may happen and we ask ourselves what we did to God to make him angry. I ask myself this a lot ... "Why is God making this so hard? What did I do to make him so mad at me?" And you start to question all those things you've done in your past. I've even had this conversation with a good friend and she tried to explain to me that God doesn't do things out of spite. He doesn't make bad things happen to punish us. I listened to her try to explain that to me, but deep down, I wasn't convinced. That was awhile ago and I haven't brought it up to many others since then.
But in today's sermon, our pastor talked about how God has a patient love for us. He keeps giving us chances to life the life he wants us to live, even if we keep making mistakes. He forgives us. And he will test us, but he will not give us more than we can handle and he will provide a way out for us so we are able to withstand and endure those challenges. It just really hit home a lot of the feelings that have been jumbling up inside me. It was one of those LIGHTBULB moments I always see when I'm teaching something to my kids.
Of course, I sent a text to my good friend right after church to tell her all about it. It was just what I needed to hear. Like I mentioned earlier, I am really trying to just relax this month. I feel like a happier person. I've been able to go to some of my students' extracurricular activities and see those cuties outside of school and that has been fun. They always look so much smaller in the "real world." One of those cuties came up to me on Friday, gave me a big hug, and goes, "Mrs. Kellett, I love coming to school because it's so fun." Every teacher's dream right there.. totally melted my heart. And if you knew this little boy, you would understand why it meant so much.
I know I say this on like, every post, but I do appreciate all your comments, prayers, gestures, etc. I don't know how many people really read this, but yesterday, I had several people who I don't see on a regular basis say that they keep up with this thing and are praying for me. It really means a lot. I know this may sound silly, but I feel like your love and support has really helped me get through this month and just feel at peace with everything that has happened. It has helped give me a new sense of hope of things to come, whatever they may be. So thank you!
That's about it for now.. one last thing I also want to share is a forward I received from another friend. She said as soon as she read it, she thought of me. I printed it out and have it close by as a reminder, whenever I need it. :)
Learning
to Wait:
Learning to wait on God demands at least three things of us. First, we must be sensitive to Him. That is, we must nurture our relationship with the Father so we can hear Him when He says “Wait.” Second, we must trust His judgment. Does God know more than we do? Yes. Then we should trust Him. Third, we must be obedient to Him. If we try to make something happen on our own after God tells us to wait, then we’re heading for disaster. The Lord blesses obedience—even obedient waiting.
God doesn’t operate in a vacuum; He works within His relationship with you, on the basis of His omniscience, omnipotence, and love. Never forget He’s actively walking with you, even when He withholds an answer to prayer. It doesn’t mean He’s not there; it means He’s looking out for you even more.
Learning to wait on God demands at least three things of us. First, we must be sensitive to Him. That is, we must nurture our relationship with the Father so we can hear Him when He says “Wait.” Second, we must trust His judgment. Does God know more than we do? Yes. Then we should trust Him. Third, we must be obedient to Him. If we try to make something happen on our own after God tells us to wait, then we’re heading for disaster. The Lord blesses obedience—even obedient waiting.
God doesn’t operate in a vacuum; He works within His relationship with you, on the basis of His omniscience, omnipotence, and love. Never forget He’s actively walking with you, even when He withholds an answer to prayer. It doesn’t mean He’s not there; it means He’s looking out for you even more.
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